Perception, Observation, Personality

Father Father, let me love you.

Oh life. I'm seeing a trend. Love? Is it love? oh really life... it's love isn't it!?

Okay. The past two weeks have been phenomenal! I have learnt so much and been able to be around all this thinking and feeling. I've run into people I have encountered in my past times and reunite with them, or just reconnect with them. As for the important people, or as my colleague stated it... the people who I focus on bringing along for my journey... they are grand in helpfulness. Well I'm thinking of one in particular. ...and you know what? it's quite funny actually. I am rather self conscious that perhaps if I think something too loud or think just too intensely about something that someone might hear me (haha, I know right!).

People usually consider me to be an extrovert. I mean sure. I also know people think that I'm an idiot, or rather just not quite that intelligent. I notice that this undertone is something I am somewhat concerned about more than being perceived as either LOUD or shy. This I can control to some degree. I would very happily be the centre of attention and make the most noise (especially whilst under the influence) however usually I'm quite aware to the sensitive moments in social interaction. Whilst conversations are taking place and while people are discussing topics which I may or may not hold an opinion too, I just listen. I'm listening for clues to fill in gaps and I'm listening to values. Interestingly when I perceive a person they are a puzzle. Each small piece of information forms a piece of the puzzle and I organise it's place based on time, values, morals, assumptions and judgements. These judgements are usually accompanied by evidence that backs up my claims or perhaps even thoughts and a continuous track record for the claims. I would never make an assumption or judgement about someone unless I deemed it was particular to their character.

Imagine. Sitting around a table. or listening to a conversation which I am just a part of. or walking to somewhere. or working from somewhere.

If I'm there chances are I'm observing behaviour. Usually I would observe strangers, but if there is a much more interesting puzzle to be solved... I can be found at the heart of the problem, rearranging the pieces.

I will say one thing though, puzzles are hard when you're not sure on what the picture should look like and they are hard when you don't have all the pieces when you start. However, that's what makes them fun.

So. Each interaction I can take something from.
And the best part of this is? I can usually take something from the interactions that are absent. For example I made all the possible takes for the conversation to occur, and we could tell each other wanted it, however I left it. How amazingly frustrating, and practically perfect.

I will write more in the coming days surrounding the lyrics I first wrote, or perhaps when the mood takes me I will explain the song and its meaning to me...


Until next time,

Musochick