At the suggestion of a dear friend of mine I brought a leather bound book. I intend to keep notes on my like. I guess it will almost act as a series of writings similar to a memoir. I guess I will never know if anyone will ever be interested in reading it and it really isn't going to be as formal as a published memoir however I do intend to keep a track of what is happening or what I'm up to. Especially if when I travel or have huge life events. I think I will aim on writing a few times a week. I will start today with a small introduction. I may place photos and other objects in the book. I'm looking forward to it :)
Regards
Monday 27 October 2014
Saturday 25 October 2014
The Struggle Towards the Whole Musician
1) A well-trained ear; 2) A well-trained mind; 3) A well-trained heart; 4) A well-trained hand. All four must develop together, in constant equilibrium. As soon as one lags behind or rushes ahead, there is something wrong. - Zoltan Kodaly
So with these thoughts in mind I thought I'd create a bucket list of all the things I need to do/ or have done in order to create a little tally next to these ideas.
I'm not sure if Kodaly meant life experience, however that is how I am interpreting it.
1) A well-trained ear
- Score Study (different ensembles/ styles, levels of achievement)
- Choir (attend as many as possible)
- Singing
- Musicianship
- Conducting
- Teaching
- Performances in varied groups/ styles (Chamber, Symphony, Band, Brass Band, Choir, Chamber Choir, Solo, Jazz, Jazz Band, Musical Theatre, Sacred/ Secular, Programmatic, Rock, Popular, Orchestra)
- Listening to varied composers
- Analysis
- Dictation
- Orchestration of well known tunes
- Arranging for varied ensembles
- Performance and rehearsal of quality works
- Composition (imitating the great composers/ experimenting with your own ideas)
- Sing & Plays
- Practice (singing, playing, performing, listening, critiques)
2) A well-trained mind
- Quality higher education (finish degree)
- Travel
- Listening (to people's stories!)
- Discussion
- Reading (philosophy, music, psychology, mythology)
- Watch (quality documentaries)
- Observe
- Write (journals, documents, articles, presentations)
3) A well-trained heart
- Love
- Loss
- Teach
- Dream
- Be vulnerable
4) A well-trained hand
- Practice smart and hard
Regards,
Musochick
Saturday 18 October 2014
Proserpina
This is beautiful. I'm not sure why it speaks to me... however it does. I guess I cannot fight this...
Wednesday 15 October 2014
Young and Foolish
I'm not sure what makes me write.
I'm not even sure if this means anything to me, to you, to him.
As I write my thoughts down I reflect on the experiences I've had.
Was it him or I that made this feeling seem less real?
What makes you full of confidence?
As I sat at in the meeting last night I displayed confidence in the person behind me.
Everyone thought that this was young and foolish?
Really does my age dictate my thought process?
An old soul. Mature beyond her years. All boiled down into young and foolish in a moment.
The moment seemed to hang as I thought of the comments surrounding my life.
Shit. Does age really mean that much?
Do I really need to wait until I'm old and grey until I can have an opinion that matters?
As I get older I see this play out day in, day out.
Age does not predict experience, neither does it predict truth or honesty.
I do not think I would be able to ever convey how much this annoys me.
I'm not even sure if this means anything to me, to you, to him.
As I write my thoughts down I reflect on the experiences I've had.
Was it him or I that made this feeling seem less real?
What makes you full of confidence?
As I sat at in the meeting last night I displayed confidence in the person behind me.
Everyone thought that this was young and foolish?
Really does my age dictate my thought process?
An old soul. Mature beyond her years. All boiled down into young and foolish in a moment.
The moment seemed to hang as I thought of the comments surrounding my life.
Shit. Does age really mean that much?
Do I really need to wait until I'm old and grey until I can have an opinion that matters?
As I get older I see this play out day in, day out.
Age does not predict experience, neither does it predict truth or honesty.
I do not think I would be able to ever convey how much this annoys me.
Monday 13 October 2014
I get distracted fairly - SQUIRREL!
I lay here contemplating life. In all its glory.
No seriously.
I do.
I'm laying here thinking through and reanalysing all the interactions I had today that I consider to be important. I'm going over the words people said to me to check their meanings to make sure I took it the correct way. I lay here contemplating life. In all its glory.
It's been a long life for me so far, I mean; to be fair I'm only 21. However. I really have come a long way.
This morning at work there was child who was obviously distressed and yours truly handled the situation with maturity beyond her years. Sympathy and all!
There's a storm outside.
Oh have I ever mentioned how easily distracted I get? It's pretty bad. Everyone at work thinks it's hilarious. I cope with lists everywhere and I NEED to have multiple jobs to do at once otherwise I'd never get anything done. I'm not sure if it's related but I get bored PRETTTTTY easily. I need many things to grab my attention at once.
So maybe that's why I always over commit myself?
I found a subreddit for ENFP's and their music tastes - which... I hope is useful. I go through music like a prostitute must go through condoms. It's horrible.
^ again it has to be good to get my attention.
Goes for most things. Honestly if I'm obsessed with someone or something or an event it must be pretty damn good for me to stick with. I'm honestly surprised I've ever finished anything in my life.
Which I guess is a reason why I tend to question my sense of ... learning style and whether there is something else there or not. Hmm. I guess it doesn't matter so long as I can hone these thoughts and impulses into something good or at least worthwhile.
So back to contemplating life.
My sense of humour. Everyone when I was growing up always commented on my lack of humour or that I don't find normal things funny. My parents would say 'you have a strange sense of humour'... and even to this day they question why I don't laugh at absolutely everything that they find funny. To be honest I'm not going to laugh if it's not funny and also, I tend to be someone who shows the reaction to the emotion, not the raw emotion. It comes with the personality but it's also a good way to protect myself from outside forces. I'm a big sucker for making sure that my true self is somewhat guarded.. however I cannot deal with people who are not genuine. There's a big difference I think... we can be genuine but we do not need to share our whole self. An air of mystery is good.
I'm continue to lay here and think. I will think until I eventually drift off into sleep for a few hours before getting back up and starting my day again. I guess we will have to see what happens. If I have any ground breaking thoughts I'll be sure to share them here for the two people who read my blog.
Regards,
No seriously.
I do.
I'm laying here thinking through and reanalysing all the interactions I had today that I consider to be important. I'm going over the words people said to me to check their meanings to make sure I took it the correct way. I lay here contemplating life. In all its glory.
It's been a long life for me so far, I mean; to be fair I'm only 21. However. I really have come a long way.
This morning at work there was child who was obviously distressed and yours truly handled the situation with maturity beyond her years. Sympathy and all!
There's a storm outside.
Oh have I ever mentioned how easily distracted I get? It's pretty bad. Everyone at work thinks it's hilarious. I cope with lists everywhere and I NEED to have multiple jobs to do at once otherwise I'd never get anything done. I'm not sure if it's related but I get bored PRETTTTTY easily. I need many things to grab my attention at once.
So maybe that's why I always over commit myself?
I found a subreddit for ENFP's and their music tastes - which... I hope is useful. I go through music like a prostitute must go through condoms. It's horrible.
^ again it has to be good to get my attention.
Goes for most things. Honestly if I'm obsessed with someone or something or an event it must be pretty damn good for me to stick with. I'm honestly surprised I've ever finished anything in my life.
Which I guess is a reason why I tend to question my sense of ... learning style and whether there is something else there or not. Hmm. I guess it doesn't matter so long as I can hone these thoughts and impulses into something good or at least worthwhile.
So back to contemplating life.
My sense of humour. Everyone when I was growing up always commented on my lack of humour or that I don't find normal things funny. My parents would say 'you have a strange sense of humour'... and even to this day they question why I don't laugh at absolutely everything that they find funny. To be honest I'm not going to laugh if it's not funny and also, I tend to be someone who shows the reaction to the emotion, not the raw emotion. It comes with the personality but it's also a good way to protect myself from outside forces. I'm a big sucker for making sure that my true self is somewhat guarded.. however I cannot deal with people who are not genuine. There's a big difference I think... we can be genuine but we do not need to share our whole self. An air of mystery is good.
I'm continue to lay here and think. I will think until I eventually drift off into sleep for a few hours before getting back up and starting my day again. I guess we will have to see what happens. If I have any ground breaking thoughts I'll be sure to share them here for the two people who read my blog.
Regards,
Sunday 5 October 2014
My inherit shyness came to play at conference...
Woah.
WHAT A WEEK.
So many things happened that I could have only dreamed about. Well, I guess. Not really, they happened!
So. The week away taught me a lot about myself.
I think I've finally settled on the fact that I am shy which to some can be seen at introversion however I am extroverted.
Even though it's completely okay to be anything and a mixture of all things. Labels are what breaks down society into horrible groups which (as we have seen in the media lately) mean nothing but bad things for everyone involved.
So steering away from the label and away from comparisons this information was handy in deciphering a number of my social habits. I love to interact however I hate most people. So take what you will from that. What I took away from my more than various interactions over the past week is that I do not withstand conversation if I cannot take anything from it. Selfish and horrible I know. However I thrive in an environment where I am learning something - or at the very least obtaining new and useful information pertaining to MY life.
I also found out that I would rather listen. I'm not going to add to the conversation if I feel that I have nothing to give and I'm not going to make an effort in showing my approval or not. However I did notice that I will give the person a glimpse of my reaction, however not the raw emotion. Which I guess comes back into the vulnerability speech. I know, I know. But you know what? I'm still learning and I'm trying. As the week went on I found it easier to do around certain people (yes, those certain people). However I still found it difficult.
As the week went on (like summer school) I became less and less shy. I found myself calling out to people, starting the conversation and even joining in with the shenanigans. My normal 'goofy' self came back to play in the final moments of the conference.
Damn. It took that long to open up to my colleagues? No wonder my life is difficult when it comes to personal interactions.
I have known for a long time that this has been an issue of mine, however it took this long? I'm pretty good at hiding my soul, let's put it that way.
Guess what? I learnt something from the whole experience.
If I want to be good at something I have to put myself out there, and to be out there means I will make myself susceptible to criticism. I will be literally ASKING for it. Guess what? I don't care. Bring it on. I believe in myself and what I'm doing. I can take the punches.
Caio.
WHAT A WEEK.
So many things happened that I could have only dreamed about. Well, I guess. Not really, they happened!
So. The week away taught me a lot about myself.
I think I've finally settled on the fact that I am shy which to some can be seen at introversion however I am extroverted.
Even though it's completely okay to be anything and a mixture of all things. Labels are what breaks down society into horrible groups which (as we have seen in the media lately) mean nothing but bad things for everyone involved.
So steering away from the label and away from comparisons this information was handy in deciphering a number of my social habits. I love to interact however I hate most people. So take what you will from that. What I took away from my more than various interactions over the past week is that I do not withstand conversation if I cannot take anything from it. Selfish and horrible I know. However I thrive in an environment where I am learning something - or at the very least obtaining new and useful information pertaining to MY life.
I also found out that I would rather listen. I'm not going to add to the conversation if I feel that I have nothing to give and I'm not going to make an effort in showing my approval or not. However I did notice that I will give the person a glimpse of my reaction, however not the raw emotion. Which I guess comes back into the vulnerability speech. I know, I know. But you know what? I'm still learning and I'm trying. As the week went on I found it easier to do around certain people (yes, those certain people). However I still found it difficult.
As the week went on (like summer school) I became less and less shy. I found myself calling out to people, starting the conversation and even joining in with the shenanigans. My normal 'goofy' self came back to play in the final moments of the conference.
Damn. It took that long to open up to my colleagues? No wonder my life is difficult when it comes to personal interactions.
I have known for a long time that this has been an issue of mine, however it took this long? I'm pretty good at hiding my soul, let's put it that way.
Guess what? I learnt something from the whole experience.
If I want to be good at something I have to put myself out there, and to be out there means I will make myself susceptible to criticism. I will be literally ASKING for it. Guess what? I don't care. Bring it on. I believe in myself and what I'm doing. I can take the punches.
Caio.
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